9.01.2008

Tonight

It was a rough night last night. I woke to Rick having a seizure at around 2:30 in the morning. He has nocturnal epilepsy, so this happens every so often. He happened to be face down though, and when he started to come out of the seizure he was in severe pain, and wasn't able to communicate what was wrong with me. He was clutching his arm and his chest, so I thought he was having a heart attack. I called an ambulance, and the paramedics came. They assessed him, and said that his right shoulder was dislocated and that he needed to go to a hospital. He ended up having a dislocated shoulder and a fracture as well. He will probably need surgery on the fracture in the near future.

I started thinking today about how we spent last Labor Day weekend, and realized that today marked the anniversary of our horrible car accident last year. At first I was thinking that Labor Day just isn't the best day on the calendar for us, but then I started thinking about all the good things about that day last year, and all the good things today.

After the accident, there were so many people stopped on the side of the road to help get us out of the car and to help in any way that they could. I can't tell you how many people offered us water and food and supplies. There was a nice man who drove a semi-truck who let us sit in it while waiting for the ambulance. The air conditioning and shade was a nice comfort from the desert heat and shock of what had just happened. In the hospital all the staff were so nice. They had had to cut my shirt off to assess me, and I had no clothes at all with me. There was a nurse who went out to her car, and gave me an extra shirt that she had in there. When we got to the hotel next door to the hospital there was an older couple who were coming in at the same time as us. We must have looked horrible-- with cuts and scrapes and glass and baby formula and who knows what all over us. They heard us tell the desk employee that we had just been in a car accident and needed a room for the night, and immediately asked us if we were alright and if there was anything they could do. The next morning when I saw that same woman, she told me she had been praying for us. I can't tell you how much that meant to me, that someone who didn't even know us would pray for us.

That night in the hotel, as I lay there in the dark with my husband and baby, I saw things with such clarity-- how the most important thing in my life were these two beautiful people by my side that I was so lucky and blessed to call family. Nothing else mattered-- not the car, not the things in the car, not our home and possessions in in. I saw that I had a purpose here in life, that God had a plan for me, and that my family was the biggest part of it. I was filled with immeasurable gratitude.

Today my feelings run in the same direction. I know that a car accident where no one was seriously injured, and an injured shoulder may seem like small trials in the larger picture-- but the impact they have on my thoughts seem so large. I am again reminded of the basic goodness of people-- my dear friend who came over to watch Vaughn in the middle of the night without a seconds hesitation, then brought dinner over to us tonight (thank you so much Janet-- I will love you forever), my dear neighbor who has called twice to check up on us and has offered to help and take Vaughn if we needed it. All the family who have called and emailed and offered their love and prayers for Rick. I believe we all want to do good-- weather we be good friends and family, or perfect strangers on the side of the road-- deep down we love each other.

I again see with clarity how sacred life is-- how fragile it is-- how beautiful it is. My husband asleep on the couch. Little Vaughn, who sang himself to sleep tonight. And little Mason, who is moving around in my belly, ready to come home to us. Life is good. And on second thought, Labor Day might be one of the best on the calendar for us.